Turning Over the Tables: My Spiritual Journey from “Spiritual” to True Believer

For years, I called myself “spiritual.” I believed in something greater, prayed when I felt like it, and followed my intuition. But deep down, I was still restless. I chased meaning, but never quite landed. I dabbled in light but didn’t know Truth. It wasn’t until God flipped the tables in my heart—gently, but undeniably—that I found what I had been searching for all along: peace, safety, and a real relationship with Him. Not religion. Not rules. But a true, living connection. This is my journey—of how I moved from wandering to anchored, from searching to found, and how my heart finally made its home in the only place it was ever meant to be.

The Long Run Toward God

My search for God felt like a marathon—steady, consistent, and paced by grace. It didn’t happen overnight. There was no lightning-bolt moment or dramatic transformation. Instead, it was as if He kept quietly revealing Himself to me—little by little, in moments that felt almost like glimpses into another realm. That part of the story deserves its own chapter, but for now, let’s just say I always knew He was calling me… I just didn’t know how to fully answer yet.

About three and a half years ago, something shifted. I made the decision to start attending church regularly, to sit under the Word, and to do my best to live right—the Christ-like way. I wasn’t perfect. I was just trying to take small, honest steps toward Him. And over time, those steps brought me closer than I had ever been.

It took almost three years before I truly heard the calling—not just with my ears, but with my spirit. I began to see a vision for my life that aligned with the deepest desires of my heart. I knew then: if I went all in with God, He would not only walk with me—He would carry me into abundance.

I declared that 2025 would be the beginning of the greatest love story of my life—not with a person, but with the One who knew me before I was formed. What God had planned for me was more beautiful than anything I could’ve imagined on my own.

Choosing Baptism (But Not Before I Understood It)

At some point along the journey, I knew I wanted to be baptized—but not out of pressure, tradition, or emotion. I wanted to make that choice as an adult, fully aware of what it meant: to die to my old self and rise again, committed to living a holy life. But even though I wanted that, deep down I didn’t feel like I fully understood what it meant to walk it out daily.

Then came Christmas of 2024. Our church announced a 10-week discipleship journey called Rooted. It was described as a weekly rhythm to help you develop a devotional lifestyle and get to truly know God—intentionally, consistently, and personally.

In my head I thought, “Perfect. Christianity for dummies—where do I sign up?” It felt like the answer to a prayer I hadn’t even fully formed yet.

The Breakthrough I Didn't Expect

During Rooted, I was excited—truly excited. It felt like everything was aligning. But as with any true spiritual journey, God didn’t just take me higher—He took me deeper. I had to revisit and reheal emotional wounds I thought I’d already dealt with. I had to surrender some heavy burdens I didn’t even realize I was still carrying.

But through it all, I began to walk with God daily. Not out of routine, but out of relationship. I found joy in the little things. I rediscovered passion and purpose in my work. I gained a deeper understanding and compassion for people—not just who they were, but what they might be silently battling.

I was all in. Heart, mind, soul—everything. I thought the breakthrough would be external—something to see or feel. But the biggest breakthrough came quietly, humbly, at the end.

I realized I had spent years forgiving others—for their sins, their betrayals, their pain. I worked hard to break generational cycles, to extend grace, to uplift and encourage others to heal. But there was one person I had never truly forgiven.

Me.

I had been carrying the weight of my own mistakes for so long—silently punishing myself in ways I didn’t even notice. And when I came out of that baptismal water, it wasn’t just a ceremony. It was a rebirth. A release. The weight lifted. The burdens dropped. And for the first time in my life, I felt free—not just in spirit, but in soul.

Rebirth

God Turned the Tables—Literally

The weekend before my baptism, I was in Colorado celebrating my niece’s birthday. While there, I attended a church service—and the sermon that day was all about Jesus turning over the tables in the temple.

As I sat there, I felt it deep in my soul: this wasn’t just a message. It was a warning and a promise. God was flipping over everything in my life that didn’t belong, preparing me for a new way of living. A holy way. I could feel it—I knew I was on the edge of transformation.

Now here’s the part you can’t make up.

When I returned home that Monday, just days before my baptism, I opened my Bible to continue reading where I had last left off. I hadn’t been reading it in order, and to be honest, I’d never read the Bible front to back. So I had no idea what chapter was coming next.

But guess what it was?

The very chapter where Jesus turns over the tables in the temple.

I just sat there, stunned. I couldn’t breathe for a second. It was like God Himself whispered, “I see you. I’m speaking to you. And yes, everything is about to change.”

And that’s exactly what happened

So… What Happens After Baptism?

To put everything in perspective, this all took place around April 2025. Rooted had started back in late January, and I was baptized on April 9th. That was the moment I declared—publicly and spiritually—that I belonged to Jesus.

So what happens next? I’m saved. God loves me. Everything should be great, right?

Well, yes and no.

Here’s the thing: God isn’t into one foot in, one foot out. If you truly want to walk the walk, your talk better match. Being “all in” doesn’t end at the water—it starts there.

I knew I had to stay connected, so I leaned in deeper. I took a 4-week spiritual gifts class that gave me insight into how I operate, how I’m wired, and how I can bring value to the Kingdom. I realized that my purpose isn’t just some mystery floating out there—it’s actually woven into my everyday life, in my career, my gifts, and how I show up in the world.

I started asking God how I could be a light and a vessel—how I could build His Kingdom here on earth. I still had a lot to learn, so I figured: baby steps. I’ve got a childlike heart, and honestly? I needed Scripture taught to me in a simple way.

Naturally, becoming a tag team member in my church’s Sunday school was a heck yes (trying not to use bad language 😅). So now, here I am—once a week, serving and learning alongside 4th graders at the 9 a.m. service. And wow… not only am I helping them grow, but I’m starting to piece together the early part of the Old Testament in ways I never imagined.

This summer, I also jumped into our 8-week Immerse Reading Program, diving into Scripture consistently and deeply. I joined the singles ministry—monthly meetups, chances to connect outside of church, and ways to serve together. One opportunity I’m especially looking forward to? Packing meals to help feed starving kids around the world.

Even more, I’m building real, God-ordained relationships—people who are mentoring me, guiding me, helping me step into the next level of my calling.

For a while, I thought I had peaked spiritually. I asked myself, “What could possibly be next?” But wow—God has shown me that the sea has only just parted… and I can’t wait to see what’s on the other side of this mountain, and the one after that, and the one after that.

Why I’m Sharing This

So… why am I sharing all this?

Honestly? Because I wanted to. For a long time, I wasn’t sure how to talk about it without sounding like some over-the-top Bible thumper. Ya know?

But recently, I was having coffee with a woman, and she asked me about my story. Somewhere in the middle of telling her a version of what you’ve just read… I started to cry. Not just a few tears—but that ugly, can’t-stop, full-body kind of cry.

And the wild part? I hadn’t really cried in years.

They weren’t sad tears. They were tears of joy.

I looked at her and said, “I’m here. This is the peace I was searching for. This is the safety I longed for.” And I meant it. For the first time in my life, I felt like I was truly living—a healthy relationship with God, a life I love, and the birth of something beautiful inside of me.

I was bawling… from pure, overwhelming joy.

So no, this isn’t a sermon. This isn’t a pitch. This is just me, sharing my story—with honesty, vulnerability, and a heart full of gratitude. If even one person reading this feels a tug in their spirit, or a spark of curiosity, then it was worth writing every word.

Because trust me—what’s on the other side of surrender is better than anything you’re holding onto

Still Running the Race

As this marathon continues, I’ve learned something priceless: I run toward God no matter what—through the good, the bad, the confusing, and the beautiful. That’s life. But with His grace and glory covering me, it always works out. Maybe not how I planned, but always how it’s meant to be.

I’ve learned to lean into what is instead of holding on to what isn’t. That one shift in mindset gave me so much peace. A freedom. A new way to live a full and meaningful life.

I want to thank Scottsdale Bible Church for creating a place of worship for individuals like me—people seeking something bigger, something deeper, something real. I walked in unsure, and now I walk out rooted in purpose and identity.

This fall, I’m excited to be serving in Alpha, a program designed for new believers and those exploring faith. It’s a safe space to bring honest questions, to have raw conversations without judgment, and to build community around what really matters.

If you’re curious about getting closer to God in your everyday life, I highly recommend the Rooted program. It’s exactly what it sounds like—a foundation to get aligned (or realigned) with God's plan for your life.

And before I close, I want to give a heartfelt thank you:

To my family and friends who supported me through this journey with prayer, encouragement, and love—thank you. To the clients I discovered were also walking in faith—your support at my baptism meant more than words. To everyone I’ve shared this story with—thank you for listening, for cheering me on, and for letting me be open and vulnerable.

Your love, support, and presence in my life have been part of this beautiful rebirth.

Because here’s what I know without a doubt:

I am a believer. And I believe no one should ever feel alone, lost, unworthy, or stuck.

You’re being called. You just have to pick up the call.

Reading of my testimony